This was the writing prompt: All that I had left of my wings was a single solitary feather:
Hurt, pain, brokenness – No matter what I do or how hard I try it never fails, I mess up. I’m a failure. Fear anger, lowliness. My emotions control me. Lost, dazed, confused. How do I take my life back? I know I’m not a bad person. I can be loved… Right? I was born innocent and over my life span I look demonic. I seem to be attracted to deadly, dangerous and destructive people, places and things. I know this is not the life I was destined for. I can do such amazing things if I put my mind to it. I have to change my perception on life. I have to think about what I am thinking about I cannot start the race and give up again. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me; I am more than a conqueror. There is nothing I can’t achieve BELIEVE THIS! I’m stuck in the middle of a spiritual struggle. It’s a tug of war, Angels vs. Demons. I know I can live a righteous life but I am prone to the evil side. What’s wrong with me? Some say it’s my nature, I was born a sinner. So what do I do? I pray and transform my mind to think like Christ. I have tried time in and time out. I continuously fail. Why try anymore? I know I can do it for a short time only to fall back into the same routine. I am doomed… not this time. I got this. The only stopping me is self. Dust yourself off. Pick up your cross and follow me, he says. So I start studying and storing away scripture in my heart. Now I can quote verses. This is not so bad. It feels good this peace and a sound mind are real. Damn I am getting attacked, everyone is against me, and I am shunned. Could it be because I am changing? Is it me or is it them? Am I faking this? This sucks maybe my mom was right, she should have aborted me, and I will never amount to anything. I need medicine to be normal. Forget that, God can heal me, I am unique, and I am a born leader. I was made to set an example. I love and forgive. I deserve love and forgiveness. I am finally learning that I get attacked when I do well. One by one the devil is plucking my feathers. I am an angel just misguided Damn it, I am down to one final feather. I have to hold on to it! If I lose it I am never going to have my chance at winning this fight! I want to spread my wings and FLY… You’ll never get to that point… It is OVER… No way I am going to win! SILENCE! Now I have 2 feathers. Stop negativity the moment it comes courage to be me alone and when someone is looking. Now I have 3 feathers. Hope I will make it to the end of this race even if one of the hurdles knocks me down I will make it over the next one with ease. Now I have 5 feathers. Trust, yeah you hurt me but we all make mistakes. I love you more because you are still here. Now I have 7 feathers. I love myself no matter if I always get things right or not there is no such thing as perfection. My wings are complete. My feathers may have fallen off but they grew back. Even when it looks as if there is no way out God always makes a way. Thank you Jesus.