Just for Today

I prayed for God to kill me once or twice, that was the cost, that was the price, I’d be willing to pay to make the pain go away.

A pain so deep it sinks into your bones, comes and goes, won’t leave you alone. Varying symptoms it likes to give, leaving you wondering if this is a life you live. Can’t call it a life ‘cause its merely existence, so this drug of choice didn’t put up resistance.

If I could go back and change things somehow, knowing all the things that I know now, the first flick of the needle, the feel of the band, I would have said no, would of turned and ran. No longer to kill, not what I pray, now my prayer starts out:

God, just for today.

by, Milly C. Rachel

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2 thoughts on “Just for Today

  1. I sometimes wonder if I could have done things differently even if I knew then what I know now. Some of us learn the hard way and the only way can change is, like you said, just for today.

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